finally home

A few minutes ago, I closed the car door, checked the mailbox and greeted my kitty as he ran up the walk to our front door.  It was a great weekend away with one of my girlfriends at a women’s conference. Upon opening the front door, I was welcomed with the most wonderful feeling – home.

I don’t know about you, but “home” is a word that I have struggled with over the years.  For me, the reason is simple.  I moved more times in the first 25 years of my life than I can count on two hands.  And I’m not just talking a move across town or to the next state.  I’m talking out of country and later across the country kind of moves.

This left me feeling a little lost not only culturally (I mean, c’mon…  what is normal y’all?!) but emotionally as well.  I almost felt as if I had left bits and pieces of me behind with every move.

But how I longed for home.  A place of comfort and rest.  A place where I felt welcomed.  A place I could be myself and it would be ok.  A place that I could always come back to.  A place where life was lived and I was a part of it and I mattered.

It was today, as I closed my car door, checked the mailbox and greeted my kitty – not to mention the flowers that are dying because I over-watered then under-watered them – that the truth hit me.

I am home.

No, I don’t just mean that I am at a physical address where we reside.  I’ve had plenty of those in my life.  No, I’m talking about a knowing, a feeling, a welcoming into a place where I can be myself.  A place where life has been lived – the good, the bad, and the everyday sacred.  A place that my husband and I are building together.  A place that we value deeply.  A place we welcome others with open hearts and arms.  A place where perfection is overrated and grace is extended.  A place where we seek Jesus and live out our faith.

A place where it’s not always good, but we know the One who makes all things good.

And we fully trust Him.

Patiently.

Joyfully.

Expectantly.

How beautiful it is to know this place is my own! How blessed am I that God chose to redeem that broken place in my life!  That He has given me a bit of heaven on earth in this home of mine.

Home matters to me.  It’s a place I’ve always longed for.  And today I realize that it is no longer a dream. It’s a reality.

I am overwhelmed by how redemption has played a part in something that many may call trivial.  But God knew it mattered to me, and He has lovingly blessed me.

He’s a good Dad, and I love this home He’s given me.